Give something back

“The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”
Mahatma Gandhi

According to Dr. Martin Luther King (Jr), life's most persistent question is, "What are you doing for others?"  As a mum, you may feel that everything you do is for others, and that you never get a chance to do anything for yourself!  And it’s true that, in today’s mad busy world, it’s a challenge to keep on top of all the jobs that need doing and people that need seeing within our ‘inner circle’ of family and friends, without taking on board any more than that.  But (and this is a big ‘but’) research shows that we’d actually feel better if we did more to help others … as long as we don’t get worn down by relentless giving.

People who perform acts of kindness will often say that it makes them feel good.  However, they may not realise quite how powerful the positive effects can be, not just on their mood but on their overall physical and psychological health.  Allan Luks, the former Executive Director of the Institute for the Advancement of Health in the States, studied kindness and documented his findings in a book - ‘The Healing Power of Doing Good: The Health and Spiritual Benefits of Helping Others’.  Luks' study involved more than 3,000 volunteers of all ages at more than 20 organisations throughout the country.  He sent a 17-question survey to these volunteers, asking them how they felt when they did a kind act.  A total of 3,296 surveys were returned to Luks, and after a computerised analysis, he saw a clear cause-and-effect relationship between helping and good health.  Luks concluded, "Helping contributes to the maintenance of good health, and it can diminish the effect of diseases and disorders both serious and minor, psychological and physical."  So here’s a summary of what you might stand to gain from giving a little kindness …

Top ten reasons to give something back

1. it helps to keep you well by strengthening the immune system and contributing to the maintenance of good health
2. it helps to make you better by diminishing the effect of diseases and disorders, and enhancing the immune system’s ability to heal and recover
3. it gives you a “helper’s high” by creating an initial rush of euphoria (involving the release of the body's natural painkillers, the endorphins) which is followed by a longer-lasting period of calm and improved emotional wellbeing
4. it counteracts the effects of stress and may diminish stress-related health problems such as depression, over-eating, ulcers and even asthma
5. it helps to protect you from negative emotions such as anger and hostility, which negatively arouse and damage the body
6. it connects you with other people and these relationships of love, friendship or positive bonding help to reduce isolation and stimulate emotions that can strengthen the immune system
7. it makes you feel better in yourself and about yourself by increasing your sense of optimism, happiness and self-worth
8. it makes you feel better just remembering what you did ... and the health benefits return hours or even days later
9. it makes the other person / people feel better as well which is probably the reason you did it in the first place
10. it helps to make the world a better place, and let's face it, that's worth a bit of extra effort!

Okay, so you're convinced ... so now here are some suggestions as to how you could get involved and get that "helper's high"!

Top ten ways to give something back

1. Carry out random acts of kindness
2. Look after your local community
3. Share your expertise
4. Support people in need
5. Work with children and young people
6. Protect animals
7. Get cultural
8. Take care of the environment
9. Campaign for change
10. Give love overseas

1. Carry out random acts of kindness

Just look around you and see whose life you can touch with a random act of kindness.  It could be someone you know, or someone you don’t.  And it only needs to be something small - an unexpected compliment to a colleague, a bag of groceries for a homeless person, a bunch of flowers for the old lady who lives next door.  Use your imagination, step out of your comfort zone … and just see how much of a positive impact you can have on the people around you.

The Random Acts of Kindness Foundation
Danny Wallace - his 'Join me' campaign and joinees' forums

2. Look after your local community

Get to know your neighbours.  Find out what’s going on in their lives.  Think about what they might need and what, if anything, you could do to help.  Take an interest in your community and play a proactive role in making it a better place to live.  Of course, the best way to start is just by talking to people - an old-fashioned approach, perhaps, but still effective!  Set up a group on Mummo for mums / parents in your local area and use this as a way of sharing information and supporting each other.  For example, you might hear about a mum going into hospital and be able to organise a rota to cook food for her family whilst she’s out of action.  The power of the internet can connect people globally, and yet it can also be a great way of putting you in touch with people who live just a few streets away who you might never know about otherwise.

3. Share your expertise

You don’t have to donate money to make a difference.  One really worthwhile way of giving something back is by sharing your skills and experience - for example, if your professional background is in PR, you could help get press coverage for a local charity.  Or, if you’re a talented seamstress, perhaps you could run a sewing club at your children’s school?  Play to your strengths.  If you're not a natural born carer, that's fine - what CAN you offer?  And remember, it’s not just your skills that are valuable, your personal experiences can be equally as important.  Take a look at Horsesmouth - a social networking site that enables you to mentor other people and help them through tough times without you even having to leave the house!

Mentoring and Befriending Foundation 
Big Brothers Big Sisters in the UK
Mentor UK

4. Support people in need

There are loads of things you can do to provide support for people in need - for example, the homeless, ill, disabled and elderly - in your own community or beyond.  You might like to help out at a hospital, hospice, or old people’s home, or work as a volunteer on a ‘phone line.  You could organise donations of things like baby equipment to a local women’s refuge, or work in a hostel for the homeless over Christmas.  You could get involved in fundraising for relevant charities, either by standing in the street, organising an event or doing some kind of sponsored challenge.  There are many many opportunities to support people in need, you won’t have to look very far!

Samaritans
Childline
Scope
Marie Curie Cancer Care
Macmillan Cancer Support
Mind
Refuge
Shelter
Help the Aged
Home-Start
RNIB
RNID

5. Work with children and young people

One of the most inspiring things about working with children and young people is that you have an opportunity to help shape them for a better future.  So, just by going into your local school for a couple of hours a week and listening to some little ones read, you are planting seeds that have enormous potential for growth!  Or perhaps you could lend a hand at your local youth club, or with the guides, scouts or sea cadets - they all rely on the support of committed volunteers.  And their work has a huge positive impact in giving children and young people something constructive to do, keeping them off the streets and out of trouble!

Barnardos
NSPCC
Save the Children
Prince’s Trust
The Guide Association
The Scout Association
The Sea Cadets

6. Protect animals

If you feel passionately about protecting animals, you might like to do something constructive to help.  You can be hands on - for example, helping out at an animal sanctuary or giving unwanted pets a temporary home until they find a family to love them permanently.  Or, alternatively, you could help out with the admin, shops or fundraising for an animal-related charity.

WWF
RSPCA
PDSA
RSPB
Dogs Trust
Cats Protection
Blue Cross

7. Get cultural

Many of us take our cultural heritage for granted.  For example, despite knowing how much it costs to look after our own homes, we don’t tend to give much thought to the vast budgets required to maintain our historic buildings.  In addition, many of our museums, galleries and theatres rely on fundraising and the support of volunteers to keep going.  You may think these things are less important than other aspects of society … and yet, imagine a world without them.  Our cultural riches are part of our history.  If this is something that interests you, perhaps it’s also a way in which you could give something back.

Voluntary Arts Network
English Heritage
National Trust
British Association of Friends of Museums

8. Take care of the environment

There is a particular focus on the environment at the moment, due to fears over global warming and the future of the planet.  Even if we’ve never been interested before, we tend to suddenly get interested when we have children - after all, we want them to have a world to grow up in!  So, if this is something you really care about, consider what you could actually do to make a difference.  Of course, you can start by living as ‘green’ a lifestyle as possible, and encouraging other people to do so too.  Do your bit to communicate the message at work, for example.  And remember that it’s not just about saving Planet Earth, it’s also about looking after the landscape around us.  Conservation is a huge responsibility and, again, much of it is carried out by volunteers.  There’ll almost certainly be a group in your local area that spends Saturdays clearing pathways and coppicing woods!  Or you could try a bit of ‘guerilla gardening’ to help create more green!

Greenpeace
Friends of the Earth
Council for the Protection of Rural England (CPRE)
British Trust for Conservation Volunteers (BTCV)
Women’s Environmental Network (WEN)
The Conservation Foundation
The Rainforest Foundation

9. Campaign for change

Sometimes the most useful thing to do is simply stand up and be counted.  Add your voice to other people’s to create a clamour that can’t be ignored.  If there’s something you feel really strongly about, campaign for change.  It might be stopping a supermarket chain from building an out-of-town store that will put the independent local shops out of business … or it might be fighting to protect human rights and put an end to torture.  Most campaigns and political movements rely heavily upon the active involvement of volunteer supporters, and this can be a great way to meet likeminded people and put into practice what you believe in.  And remember, you can also vote with your feet, and with the pennies in your purse.  If you want to support fair trade, for example, don’t buy anything that isn’t!

Amnesty International
Liberty
The Refugee Council
Stonewall
Make Poverty History

10. Give love overseas

Of course, whilst there are plenty of ways to give something back in the UK, there are also millions and millions of people overseas who need help.  And, let’s face it, their situations are often far more extreme than even the most disadvantaged people here.  You can give something back by supporting charities that do development and aid work overseas - for example, by donating your money, your goods, your time and your skills.  When you don’t know what to buy for a person with everything, give them a ‘good gift’ or ‘gift for life’.  Lots of charities are doing these now, and it’s a great way to make everyone happy!  You could also sponsor a child in a developing country, and receive regular updates on how s/he is doing - something that might really help your own children to appreciate how lucky they are!  Or, if you can make the time, how about actually going and helping on a voluntary project for a while?  Whether you go for a few days, weeks or months, it could be a life-changing experience for everyone concerned.

Oxfam
UNICEF
CAFOD
British Red Cross
Christian Aid
Plan
Volunteer Work Information Service

There are literally hundreds of charities in the UK, quite apart from worldwide, and it’s impossible to mention more than a handful of the bigger ones here.  See Charity Choice and Give and Take.  There are also many other ways to ‘give something back’, so see this as a starting point rather than a definitive list!  Use your imagination and see how creatively you can contribute to society.

Remember, as a Mummo member, you can offer your services as a volunteer by placing a classified advert, for free, on the Community and contribution noticeboards.  If you’re already involved in a charity, not-for-profit organisation or social enterprise, you can advertise any openings you may have for volunteers in exactly the same way.  And finally, here are ten useful websites to do with volunteering that can provide all sorts of additional information and help you to find exactly the right kind of opportunity for you.

1. Volunteering England
2. Reach online
3. Do it
4. Timebank
5. Voluntary Service Overseas (VSO)
6. Community Service Volunteers (CSV)
7. Directgov (the Government's information website for the public)
8. Idealist.org (action without borders)
9. Worldwide Volunteering
10. Vinspired (for 16-25 year olds)

And, last but definitely not least, take a look at www.365act.com - read a page a day and do what it suggests, and if we all do the same the world will soon be an even better place!